How to Create Balance with 3 Types of Boundaries & Energy Awareness
Work-life balance is a hot topic. Some people say they don’t believe it even exists. So, is it really achievable?
Creating work-life balance is more than an intellectual pursuit. Unfortunately, it doesn’t always look like a perfect pie chart or exact 50/50 percentages, because life is always changing. More useful than a highly planned schedule incorporating “work-life balance”, a life skill that can truly serve us is learning how to “go with the flow” – especially when big life changes hit.
Balance is a state of being; it’s an energy that reflects an inner-feeling, a state of consciousness. And we can learn how to bring our energy into our body and experience a true state of inner-balance.
The “Energy” of Balance
How do we guide our clients when they get thrown by a major life change? What can we do as coaches to internally shift ourselves towards a state of balance?
One of the best ways to do this is to become aware of “the energy of balance” and use this to guide us. Once we attune to the energy of balance and how it feels, we can learn how to embody it and show others how to do the same.
Balance promotes a state of mind, one that is clear and present. When we intend balance and shift our focus there, our energy follows.
How to know when you’re feeling balanced or unbalanced:
On an energy level, we can tell when we’re balanced and when we’re unbalanced.
- When we’re unbalanced, we often feel: Pressured, stressed, taxed, drained, uneasy, anxious, depressed.
- And when we’re balanced, we feel: a true sense of well-being, ease, flow, peaceful, relaxed.
Both of these experiences create an inner-state of being, one that’s energetic in nature. So, when we say we’re unbalanced we could say we’re low energy. And when we’re balanced, we have positive energy. We feel bright, vital, on-point, fresh.
What we’re really looking for:
At the end of the day, we’re not just looking for balance, we’re looking for energy. We want to have the energy to feel motivated to achieve our personal dreams.
What I propose is to think more about what gives you energy, and to become aware of your energy levels so that you can experience true balance.
Here are 3 basic steps towards creating balance and boundaries by raising your energy awareness:
1) Become aware of your energy
We are all made of energy. In eastern traditions this energy is referred to as prana or chi, and this essential “life force” energy runs through the channels and meridians of the body.
When our energy is flowing we are free from pain, disease and tension. Once we start to experience blocks or stagnation, our energy gets thwarted out of balance.
The way to cultivate awareness of your energy is through daily consistent practice. Here are a few ways to consider:
- Qi-gong, energy healing or meditation.
- The simple practice of paying attention – simply observe your energy throughout the day.
- Notice how the quality of your energy shifts moment-to-moment.
- Become aware of when your energy feels bright and full, and when your energy begins to drop.
The more you know and understand your energy, the more you’ll know how to cultivate it and keep it in balance.
2) Know what affects your energy
There are many factors that affect your energy. These range from your environment to the work you do and the people you surround yourself with. For example, we tend to receive positive energy from natural environments that include flowing bodies of water and large green trees.
But you’re the only one who knows what truly affects your energy. Pay attention to what nourishes your energy, and what depletes your energy. Take action to increase time spent on nourishing activities, and limit your time on depleting activities and engagements.
3) Create balance through boundaries
One of the best ways to experience heightened energy is to create clear boundaries.
Firstly, set healthy boundaries with yourself
The most important boundary begins with yourself. What agreements do you make with yourself? What do you do to take care of yourself every day?
For example, do you engage in activities that actively promote your energy like healthy eating, exercise and mindfulness practice? Do you have boundaries with technology, work and social media? Or do you stay up all hours of the night constantly scrolling and reading, go to bed late and feel tired the next morning?
Secondly, practice healthy boundaries with others
Do you tend to overextend or sacrifice yourself in order to be there for others? Give your energy and power away unknowingly? Do you feel the need to do this in order to be liked, accepted or needed?
Think about the amount of time and energy you dedicate to yourself, and your own creative or passionate pursuits. How much attention do you invest compared to the amount of time and energy you give to others? What changes do you need to make in order to feel more whole, complete and centered? Communicate your needs to others who may drain or expect constant access to your attention.
Now, consider what boundaries you need to set to create more balance
Boundaries are not borders. They are not walls to block people out of our lives. They help us be honest and authentic about where we truly want to place our time and focus. The best boundaries are clear, peaceful and honouring to all people involved. They create containers of positive, focused energy where we can naturally experience balance and offer the best of who we are.
Create “energetic” boundaries
Consider making more than just “space” and “time” boundaries. Think of “energetic” boundaries, of creating a sacred space and honoring that space for others. In this energetic space, everyone can thrive, prosper and grow.
So what would “energy boundaries” look and feel like to you? Perhaps it means not taking clients home with you in your head (and energy), and to lovingly let them go when you’re not with them. You could do this through grounding and releasing.
Energetic boundaries may also mean being honest with your loved ones about what you can do, and what you can’t do. It may require you to speak your truth and express your true needs.
As Author Brene Brown says, Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves, even when we risk disappointing others. We can’t base our own worthiness on others’ approval. Only when we believe, deep down, that we are enough can we say ‘Enough!’
Balance isn’t a destination. It’s not something we achieve one day. It’s a constant state of awareness. A daily practice.
Instead of crashing and burning out, take time to listen to your energy each day. Take the small steps you need to feel healthy, fresh and free. Small steps are easier to integrate into positive daily habits like meditating, exercising and taking mindful breaths.
Use mindfulness to create inner balance
You can experience balance by cultivating a moment-to-moment state of awareness. Mindfulness practice is the best way to begin to create true inner-balance. If you’d like to learn how to do this for yourself you can visit our site to learn how to develop a consistent, daily practice.
When you have energy and feel balanced, you benefit not only yourself, but you benefit your loved ones and all the people you touch. When others are in your presence, they will also receive the energy of balance. It’s a gift that keeps giving. The energy of balance is worth paying attention to.
Originally posted through The Coaching Tools Company.