When something or someone rubs you the wrong way, how do you deal with it?
1. Avoid them 2. Make them wrong 3. Make yourself wrong 4. Resist them 5. Cut them out of your life 6. Pretend you’re better 7. Shut down 8. Withdraw 9. Eat chocolate
The list goes on. We want to point the finger at someone else when they make us feel uncomfortable or upset. But what if we saw resistance as our teacher? What if we saw it as an opportunity to heal and grow?
You may have noticed that it’s harder to be present when you experience resistance. When negativity hits, it’s like a swirl of inner chaos that the ego tries to stop through one of the above mentioned self-defense mechanisms. We let hardness build inside, and rather than let ourselves surrender to the feeling of resistance, we push against it even more.
When we experience resistance arising in us, do we choose to project the resistance, internalize the resistance, or give it space to exist? It doesn’t matter who or what triggers our resistance, what matters is how we choose to relate to it. When you meet resistance with resistance, you just get more resistance. But if you meet resistance with space, transformation happens and higher possibilities emerge.
Mindfulness Meditation Breathing
When you practice meditation and mindful breathing, you create inner clarity and mental space. The incessant stream of thoughts have breathing room, and in those pauses, higher inspiration has a chance to flow through. More room for “a-ha’s” in regards to our own short-sightedness. It becomes easier to be present. It also becomes easier to be present when difficult feelings arise.
What would it be like to be fully present with what you don’t like? To simply notice what arises without getting emotionally entangled and involved? What if you created spaciousness for your own resistance?
The next time you feel tension rising in you, take a moment to self-reflect. Instead of push the resistance away, welcome it for a cup of tea. Then see what it would be like to meet the resistance with a sense of pure spaciousness. You might very well find that your guest won’t stay for another cup of tea.